| Freya: | Here it is Waffle! I’m starting to tear up just looking at it! |
| Waffle: | Why does this mattress store cause you tears? |
| Freya: | Cause somewhere within those walls lies a lonely bed that’s begging for my body! |
| Waffle: | Bed’s are inanimate objects that do not ‘beg’. |
| Freya: | *sigh* I sometimes wish that were true, but when fat and bed meet in perfect harmony, it makes it all worth it! |
| Waffle: | I do not comprehend. |
| Freya: | It’s ok, one day you’ll find the bed calling your name Waffle! |
| Waffle: | There is nothing calling my name other than you. |
| Freya: | Haha, I do that a lot huh! Anyways, why don’t we enter this pillowy paradise! |
| Freya: | Huh, are the beds sleeping? Waffle, do you see a light switch anywhere? |
| Waffle: | I have located the lightswitch, however there appears to be water damage on the ceiling and walls. It would not be advisable to turn them on in these conditions. |
| Freya: | Hey Waffle, watch this! Fat Lux! Hehe, just a little casual magic, no biggie~ |
| Waffle: | That was not magic. You flipped the lightswitch while I was not looking. |
| Freya: | Prove it! Haha you can’t cause it was totally magic! |
| Freya: | Whoa look at that, oh ho ho! oh my gosh, hehe hello beautiful! |
| Waffle: | Beds cannot communicate. |
| Freya: | Ooo you’re so soft yet firm! Hehe stop it, you’re such a flirt! Oh, but really? Do you really think you can handle all this? Well if you insist~ |
| Freya: | Uuuhhhggg!! |
| Waffle: | Are you alright? |
| Freya: | Nope! She’s a bed of nails dressed in soft sheets! Grunt, phew, uhg! *pant, pant* Help! Waffle! She’s got me trapped in her vile clutches! She-she’s hurting my back and!! Oh no, not the butt not the butt, Ahhhh! |
| Waffle: | Helping. |
| Freya: | Phew, I really thought that was gonna be my *huff* my death bed! Phew! Why don’t we teach *puff* this truck bed a lesson! They’ve really messed with the wrong fat ass! |
| Waffle: | How do you intend on punishing a bed? |
| Freya: | Mwahahaha! I’m gonna take away something it really values. You know what that is Waffle? |
| Waffle: | No. |
| Freya: | The mattress tag! Without it, no one will be able to buy her or lie in her devouring clutches ever again! |
| Waffle: | Firstly, there are no living humans to purchase it. Secondly, it is illegal to remove the mattress tag. |
| Freya: | Pff, what are they gonna do? Send in the mattress task force? HA! Even if they do catch me, I know the court will see this as a crime of passion! Yoink! |
| *The fire alarm sounds off* |
| Freya: | Oh crap! I’ll put it back I’ll put it back! Please don’t send me to jail! I’m too fat for a cell! |
| Waffle: | Freya, we need to evacuate the building. There is smoke indicating a fire. |
| Freya: | No way… THEY’RE TRYING TO BURN THE EVIDENCE! Now that I devalued the mattress they wanna make their money back from insurance! |
| Waffle: | Freya, ride me so we can evacuate. |
| Freya: | Right now. I mean… Oh, I was, nevermind haha! Let’s hurry outa here! |
| Waffle: | Running. |
| Freya: | Whoa, slow down! You’re pretty wobbly! |
| Waffle: | I will decrease my speed when we are at a safe distance from the store. |
| Freya: | Wow you’re fast! |
| Freya: | Goodbye mattresses, may you all find peace in matress heaven! Except for that one harlot, she deserves a special spot in mattress hell… |
| Freya: | You think any turned into ghosts? |
| Waffle: | No. However, their ashes will fertilize the earth. Making it possible for new mattresses to be fabricated in the future. |
| Freya: | Huh, that’s really poetic of you, I like that thought! You think we’re far enough away yet? |
| Waffle: | If the building were to fall, dust and debris would reach us in this location. My calculations indicate a safe zone 0.1 miles away. |
| Waffle: | Warning. Unsteady ground. Falling. |
| Freya: | Ahhh, oof! |
| Waffle: | Freya are you ok? |
| Freya: | Hehe, I’m fine! I would ask you the same, but it looks like my airbags stopped you from hitting the ground haha! |
| Waffle: | I apologize for the miscalculation in my walking cycle. |
| Freya: | Don’t worry about it! In fact, I think your miscalculation just found the bed that was calling your name! |
| Waffle: | I am not on a bed. I am positioned on top of your belly and chest. |
| Freya: | Hehe, do you feel comfortable? |
| Waffle: | I would rather have all four legs on the ground, however your fat protected my frame. |
| Freya: | That sounds like a yes to me!! If it’s comfortable and soft, it's a bed! So if you ever need a little robot rest, my massive tummy and booba are all yours~ |
| Waffle: | My frame does not require rest. However, I will utilize the offer when needed. |
| Freya: | Aww, we should do this more often. Look at how pretty the smoke is too! |
| Waffle: | Suggestion. We should refrain from setting more buildings on fire. |